No one ever thinks I’m serious when I say that I hate Fridays but its true.
If something is going to go wrong it’ll happen on a Friday.
If people are going to be pissy, snotty, in a hurry, missing a sense of humor, or rude I’ll have to talk to them on a Friday.
Every task that I wasn’t able to do all week (or put off all week) will HAVE to be done on Friday.
Every task that I need to do next week will now need to be done on Friday.
Fridays are days when people don’t want to work and are pissed at me when I make them.
Fridays are days when people call the office with an EMERGENCY and don’t understand why I can’t fix it before the weekend. Nevermind that they’ve known about this emergency since Tuesday.
You still don’t believe me? Well, let me give you an example of a Friday. This is all true, exactly how it happened and if you don’t believe me, ask the people I work with.
Woke up late (nothing new here) I usually don’t worry about what time I get to work as long as I beat my boss. Not that she says anything, its just a goal. Anyway, ran to get my only clean pair of jeans out of the dryer and realize my cat has peed IN THE DRYER. She only ended up peeing on two things, but of course one of them is my jeans. So much for clean jeans.
Pull into the parking lot at work right behind my boss. End up walking into the office with her. Lovely. Well…at least I don’t smell like cat pee.
As I’m getting my cup of coffee I get a call from an opposing counsel’s secretary. I spend the next 10 minutes getting my head ripped off by a snotty, pushy woman who insists that I am a moron. Now I’m too pissed off to even drink the damned coffee.
Spend the rest of the morning scrambling to get an ex parte order written and arguing with my boss about the best strategy on the case. I won that argument, but that means more work for me. Its Friday, so I have 3 other projects that HAVE to get done today but now I have to do all this first.
Have to unplug my printer 3 times and restart WordPerfect twice to get documents to print because my computer has decided NOT to communicate with the printer unless I jump through hoops. Because its Friday and it doesn’t want to be there any more than I do.
Meanwhile my boss has taken up residence across from me at my desk. She has moved my things out of her way and brought her work in there instead of going into her office with her desk. Apparently she wants company.
I didn’t get a real lunch hour (too much to do) but that’s okay, I’ll just run to the Sunmart, get a pop and a red bull (remember, I didn’t drink my coffee so now my ass is dragging). Get the pop and the red bull, go to the car and open the red bull which was dumb because the pop doesn’t fit in the cupholder very well and I should really hold the pop on the drive. Oh well, I’ll just be careful. Pull out of the parking lot – no problem. Drive the mile back to the office – no problem. Pull into our parking lot – no problem. Turn the corner in the parking lot to park the car – pop flies across the car. In my reaction to grab the pop before it spills, I take my hand off the steering wheel mid-turn which means I’m now heading directly for a tree. Slam on the breaks to keep from hitting said tree and the momentum causes my purse to go flying off the passenger seat and into the 32 ounce puddle on the floor. Upside down.
Good news? I didn’t hit the tree.
Throughout the day, every time my cell phone rang or I got a personal call or text, you can bet the boss was RIGHT THERE. Not that she cares a lot when we take care of stuff like that, but she does frown on it when its in her face and when we’re busy. Both of which were true today. Because its Friday, of course.
One of our newer clients comes in, I’ve only met him once and I have no idea if he even has a sense of humor. He is accused of domestic violence assault. He tells me that the last time he was in the office he saw the “victim’s” mother in the parking lot. I explain that the next time something like that happens, he should have one of us walk outside with him so we can protect him from an accusation of inappropriate behavior. I say “you need a witness, its not like I’m going to beat her up or something…” Ha. Yes, very funny dumbass.
Fast forward a couple hours, my foot has been surgically removed from my throat. The boss needs to leave. She has made that very clear. I tell her I can do this one thing before she leaves and then we won’t have to scramble on Monday morning. She says she’ll wait if its only going to take a minute. Then she says she also needs three other things done on that file before Monday.
I say “Well obviously that’s going to be more than a minute, so why don’t you go ahead and go? We’ll just have to scramble on Monday.”
I move on to other projects, planning on getting back to the boss’ list of things to do after finishing a few things. Five minutes later the boss comes in my office and snippily says “I HAVE to leave now.” I say, confused, “Are you waiting for me?” She says “Yes! You said you wanted me to wait for you!” We then figure out that she wasn’t listening to me at all when I told her she should go. She’d been sitting in her office doing whatever and waiting for me to bring her things to sign. When we get that cleared up she’s still pissed off at me and marches out. Good Lord.
The rest of the day is basically more of the same. Nothing major happens, just lots of scrambling to get things done before the end of the day. Don’t actually leave the office until 6:00.
So yeah, that’s a “normal” Friday for me. Do you get it now?