Hey man, your lyrics suck

Ally likes this song called “The Ocean” by Mae.

The actual song (rhythm/melody/etc)  is fine but the lyrics … gad.  Its to the point now that Ally won’t listen to it with me in the room because it makes me laugh which pisses her off.

The part the cracks me up is this:

Am I alone in this?
Never a night where I can sleep myself ’til day.
We must try to figure it out, figure it out.
It won’t be that easy.
We lost it somehow.

You come over unannounced.
Silence broken by your voice in the dark.
I need you here tonight,
Just like the ocean needs the waves.

Okay, first of all, I’m pretty sure the ocean doesn’t NEED the waves, the ocean would still be there if it didn’t have waves.

Second, if it does need waves, its needs them to stir up the muck at the bottom of the ocean so that the dead stuff down there can get found by the fish.  So…the fish need the waves, not the ocean.

Third, I will concede that without the waves we wouldn’t have beaches or at least not the sandy, pretty ones we like. So…the fish and the beaches need waves.

I still don’t see how the ocean needs the waves.  If anything this guy is telling this perfectly nice girl, yeah you can come over.  I don’t really NEED you to, but if you do you can stir up the muck around my house so it’ll rot faster.

How romantic.

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Random musical thoughts

Ryan Adams singing Wonderwall.  Awesome song. Love the emotion in the song. Could listen to it endlessly.

New Boyz’ “You’re a Jerk” cracks me up.  Its stupid but funny and catchy.  Will be tired of it in a week but love it for the moment.

What the hell is wrong with Kanye West?  Does anyone know?  Does anyone care?  When are they going to stop inviting him to awards shows?  Every time I’m listening to his music on the radio I imagine him interrupting himself just to say how great he is.

Speaking of Kanye…Taylor Swift is starting to REALLY annoy me.  Her songs are all sounding the same at this point and why in the hell does she breathe like that?

Idol & Issues

So I have some random thoughts/things to share, don’t be surprised if you don’t understand :)

So Michael Johns got kicked out last night, can you believe that??? I (along with everyone else) was stunned. I loved him!! And why didn’t they save him like they did last year on the IGB week?? You know that’s why he got voted off was because everyone thought they weren’t going to send anyone home. grr

Did anyone else notice the little (about 7 or 8 ) year old girl on the performance show this week holding up a sign that said “LICK THOSE LIPS”? Okay, now I know what that means, David Archuleta licks his lips ALOT while singing – but I would NEVER (even if it wasn’t creepy because I’m literally old enough to be his mother) EVER hold up a sign telling someone to “lick those lips” and I especially wouldn’t let my daughter hold it up!!! eww

and speaking of little David…I think it’s only his fans that need slapping around, he’s a great singer and his version of Imagine” is one of the BEST American Idol performances I have ever seen: David Archuleta’s “Imagine”

and speaking of imagining…when I imagined being a parent, I didn’t really imagine it being this big of a problem. But Dammit, it’s HARD!!

For example: It’s spring break and Ally was home alone. For the last few weeks we’ve been having serious problems with Ally’s behavior, with her stealing my makeup numerous times one of them (she’s not supposed to wear makeup until she’s older). She’s been grounded, spanked, yelled at and to no avail. So, during spring break she was grounded from tv (not just for the makeup, but that was part of it). I was at work and I called and said that I’d be home for lunch and we were both excited to spend time together.

I walk in the front door and there’s my beautiful daughter WEARING MAKEUP!! Like she didn’t know I was coming?? WTF!?!

So I say to my beautiful daughter “You’re wearing my makeup!!” and she responds “No I’m NOT – I wiped it all off!”

See? Parenting is hard….I didn’t kill her so I think I won that round.

Things I’ve learned this week

I’ve learned that I like red wine – not good wine, we’re talking the under $5 per bottle kind – but still, it’s wine and it’s in a bottle.  It’s a start

I’ve learned that I’m not happy being a homebody and I want to get out and meet people – any people.

I’ve learned that getting together with friends is one of my favorite activities.

I’ve learned that just because someone hurts you doesn’t mean you always get to act hurt for as long as you want.

I’ve learned that people who hurt you once WILL do it again – it’s not a matter of if, it’s when.

I’ve learned that being a good parent is more important to me than it is to others.

I’ve learned that I ROCK at Scene It! Even DeWayne says so, and that’s something!

I’ve learned that limeaid party isn’t as lame as it sounds…quite the opposite actually.

I’ve learned that being the bad guy is probably going to be my role in life for a long time and there’s nothing I can do about it.

I’ve learned that I’ve been giving away my control over if I’m happy or not.

I’ve learned that I’m a sucker for people being nice to me – even if they’re not really.

I’ve learned that being angry at yourself for being a sucker is almost as bad as the anger you feel toward the person you believed.

I’ve learned that some people don’t think my friendship is worth anything.

I’ve learned that I know better.

I’ve learned that my kid is HILARIOUS.  (If you ask, I’ll explain what’s so funny about a Vietnamese restaurant or her reaction to hearing what was really “wrong “with the cat.)

I’ve learned that cat’s go into heat as early as 4 months old – Oreo is 5 months old.

I’ve learned that I have very few social skills and I’m too shy to use the ones I have very often.  (okay, I already knew that, but it bears repeating)

I’ve learned that I can never remember if “its” is with or without the appostrophe if it is the possessive one but I’m too lazy to look it up every time and I’m REALLY too lazy to spell it out every time.

I’ve learned I can’t remember if it’s bears or bares when saying “it bears repeating”

Yeah, so obviously you can tell from all that that it’s been an eventful couple weeks around here.  I really don’t want to go into details, mostly because I’m so tired of it all.  Suffice it to say that there have been some major changes in my life and I’m pretty sure that it’s all for the best…once I get over the anger and hurt.

Now for the fun stuff – I got my tax refund a few weeks ago and, of course, went on a (reserved) shopping spree for all the things we don’t buy any other time of year.   Here is a list of some of the things we got:

A new office chair (for the house office)

New outfits for Ally and I

4 (count them FOUR) new bras – all of them a different (much bigger) size than what I was wearing before.

2 new cd’s by Ray LaMontagne  – awesome

lots of other little stuff we needed and….

A NEW CAMERA!!  :)   A Canon EOS Digital Rebel.  It’s last year’s model and it was a floor model so it was on clearance.  Only problem is that now I want the really ooh la la lens for it and that costs almost as much as what I paid for the camera.  Oh well. maybe next year.

Okay – fingers are tired. I’m done for tonight.

I need a little…

So I’m sitting at my desk at work and listening to Pandora radio (still loving it by the way) and I hear the lyric

“I need a little direction”

Now, that’s what my ears heard but that is NOT what my brain heard.

My good ol’, distracted, over-worked and obviously dirty mind heard:

“I need a little erection”

First thought – who the hell wants a little one??

Second thought – Oh! DIRECTION! hah! hahahahaha

My new favorite thing

If Oprah can tell you all about her favorite things and people care all about it, I can too, right? :)

This is mine…it is Pandora.com and it’s a programmable radio station (or stations) that you can listen to stuff you like and nothing else — or as close to that as you can come for free.  Anyway, if you listen to radio all day long at work or whatever, you’ll really like this.  Just sign up for free, put in your favorite artist or song and away you go.  If finds other artists or songs that are similar to that and plays those too.      The more you put in the more music it’ll play that match those.  Don’t put in too many different kinds though, make different radio stations for what you want, it seems that after a few too many genres it starts to play really random stuff.

Have fun with it and tell me what you think, I’m loving it so far.

Speaking of music, have you heard Alicia Keys’ new song? It’s awesome.

Just one thing

Have you ever heard the song “The Picture” by Kid Rock and Sheryl Crow.

That song drives me nucking FUTS!!

Seriously, have you ever paid attention to the lyrics?? (go here if you haven’t)

It’s been 3 fucking days and these two are sleeping with other people and missing each other? Are you kidding me? I can be away from my kid for that long and not miss her yet and you’re telling me you’re sleeping with someone else AND missing this guy.

Puhlease

I’ve never been able to tell if they were cheating on other people with each other or cheating on each other with other people, but still…..3 days??

Gag me with a spoon.